(Circa 2006-ish)
2006 KIRBY vacuum- Kicks ass! - $1000
Hardly used KIRBY VACUUM for sale.
Hardly used KIRBY VACUUM for sale.
“EWWWWW!!!! Hardly used?!? How dirty must their house be?!”, you ask? Well, the Kirby worked wonders on our ole’ nasty pet/kid/drunk stepfather in law-maltreated carpets before we ripped them up and put in swell wood flooring. Now we don’t need Kirby, just a good old fashioned corn broom!
This illustrious “Diamond Edition” Kirby comes with the Shampooing System and lots-o-funky attachments in a glorious mountable holder! This thing will sand your woodwork, blow feral cats off your porch and massage your back at the end of the day- I shite you NOT! Sorry, this is not the model that serves hot wings an’ Schlitz, nurses your newborn or de-glacierifies your roof. But it WILL summon the power of Greystoke and suck every last bit of dust mite poo, pet hair, bit of dirt and dead skin and the ilk, out of your carpets, beds, pillows, rugs, Grandpa’s toupee and whatever. Just about! Breathe easier and enjoy relief from allergens ‘cause it’s got *MiCRoN*MaGiC* HEPA FILTRATION!
BEHOLD!
This illustrious “Diamond Edition” Kirby comes with the Shampooing System and lots-o-funky attachments in a glorious mountable holder! This thing will sand your woodwork, blow feral cats off your porch and massage your back at the end of the day- I shite you NOT! Sorry, this is not the model that serves hot wings an’ Schlitz, nurses your newborn or de-glacierifies your roof. But it WILL summon the power of Greystoke and suck every last bit of dust mite poo, pet hair, bit of dirt and dead skin and the ilk, out of your carpets, beds, pillows, rugs, Grandpa’s toupee and whatever. Just about! Breathe easier and enjoy relief from allergens ‘cause it’s got *MiCRoN*MaGiC* HEPA FILTRATION!
BEHOLD!
BIG ASS WOODSTOVE$200
P.S. Can't have obese cat
6 comments:
Funny!
Nice apron!
My parents had a Kirby, a gorgeous burgundy red. That thing was so freakin' heavy, only my dad was strong enough to vacuum the stairs.
I like your apron too. :)
Man, I need a super sucker vacuum. My allergies are just over the top. I mean, I live in a green built home with no VOC paint, no carpet glue, no formaldehyde wood, eco-friendly flooring and carpets and a super filtration system and I still can't breathe. Now, one of those super sucker sucks the nails out of the floorboard vacuums might help! ;)
how much for the cat?
Fat cat? Priceless.
Kirbys are lighter and very easy to use nowadays! I would love having a burgandy one! And they do suck the crap out of stuff. literally.
That IS a great apron! "How to keep your husband"-Have dinner ready! Don't open his mail! Let him read his paper in peace! Don't nag! Don't look sloppy over the breakfast table!
HA!!!!
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