The last 3 days....in pictures

Slacklining...Dylan's birthday gift to Willa

 

 



our walls need color

 

It's been 3-4 years since I could comfortably wear a sundress in Alaska



today....on the top of Mt. Baldy

!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dear Readers....and you, too, troll.

Dear Readers,

 .....It feels weird addressing you (specifically my old "regulars")directly since I have long been out of the Blogosphere Exchange.  While I still visit many of your blogs, I rarely offer anything as far as dialogue.  As a result there are only crickets in my own comment box!  But from looking at my Site Meter Stats,  I know you're here!   A couple of  months ago I got a comment from my resident troll...the one who always says how much prettier Sarah Palin is then me?   He/she/it gleefully pointed out that HA,HA, no one even comments on your blog anymore!  Nah, Nah!  Sarah Palin is MUCH prettier than YOU!

You pathetic thing...it is to laugh!!!  :P

Glorious troll, a huge part of bloggy communicating is that "tit for tat" commenting thing.  The only bloggers out there who continually receive many comments even though they rarely respond or comment on their readers blogs are the extremely  popular and oft sponsored money makin' blogs with exemplary writing.  They don't HAVE to contribute to the give and take.  For the rest of us, if you want to attract attention to your blog and have a continuing dialogue, you MUST contribute to others.  You read and comment on my posts and I'll read and comment on yours.  For me, this was very time consuming.  And while the blogs on my roll have provided a plethora of info, inspiration, great writing/photos, (I am forever grateful for this!!!!) I simply had more important things to do with my 24 hour day.  To be frank, I really got sick and disillusioned with the superficial-ness of the Blog Exchange.  Once and awhile I would lay off commenting on the usual blogs just to see what would happen.  As predicted, comments on MY blog declined in suit.  Did people care about every post I wrote on my blog?  No.  Same here.  And that's ok.  I'm just not going to take time out to read and comment on blogs out of obligation.  That's not what I got into this for.  I'm just not playin' the game.  Most of the bloggers that I developed a bit of a personal relationship with are now Facebook friends.  It seems an easier and more intimate way to uphold our relationship anyway.  My life has changed much since Willa started school full time and I have less of a need to reach out and appeal to those past communities.  Today, my blogging is more about and for ME.  It gives me the chance to hone my writing skills.  It get's my brain primed in the morning better then any ADD drug has...it gets my creative juices flowing for painting as well.  It gives me and my family a tangible way to go back and check in with past.  It's a reminder to always be grateful for the life we have...because it is lived well.

So, my Tranny Palin Troll, I don't give a shitty shitter shit that no one comments!  And while I sure like to hear from folks, it ain't no thang that I don't.  Site Meter tells me there are 30-60 people stopping by each day to read both popular older posts and the most recent ones as well. 

To any new readers, welcome!  Make yourself at home...obligation free!  And to the old readers as well, thanks for .....SO much!!!!   My own needs aside, if I can offer up some little gem for someone from my blog, that makes me feel pretty good!

SOOOOOO pretty.  Thank the lord for  a sharp knife, wigs and injectables, eh?

What he said....

I once knew someone, who at the end of our friendship-with-benefits, felt the need to tell me that no man would ever love me or take me seriously because I didn't have my degree.  This sweet gem of an opinion could not have come at a more vulnerable and tumultuous time for me.  I could not have felt more ashamed and unworthy of love.   At that time in my life I was dealing with the inner tug of war between desperately wanting to finish a degree and have a more fulfilling and stable career ....and not understanding WHY I had always had such a hard time with school(See previous post about my ADD).  I was already in debt with student loans and some other foolish financial mistakes-the amount seemed SO overwhelming at the time, but really, looking back I have to laugh at how little my debt really was!  But it seemed so insurmountable at the time.   I had recently moved to a new state, and was just wanting to spend time with friends and get my life on track.   I wish I could have seen back then that it wouldn't be long before I had my debts paid off and a stable career that allowed me to be with my kids as much as I liked while being able to earn upwards of $70-$90 an hour.   Hey, look! Now I'm worthy of love!  Oh, wait.....I don't have a 4 year degree.  Never mind.  Ha!  What a immensely STUPID thing to say to a young women!  So ugly, superficial, misogynistic, and lacking character.  Most of the shame that I now find in those words?  That I even considered that person worthy to be in my life.


If only I could go back in time and tell that 29 year old woman that a piece of paper is NOT what defines you or makes you worthy.  It's all about what you can give to the world....what you do to mend, learn from, and evolve your own life so that you can offer something wonderful to the people and world around you  ....It's all about how you treat others.  I love the Malcolm Forbes quote, " You can judge the character of other's by how they treat those who can do nothing to them or for them."   I would whisper in that 29 year old's ear  that man that you silently secretly love deep down in your heart loves you back as well and will be the one who adores you for who you truly are AT THIS MOMENT as well as that potential that is just brimming within you!...and who will share life with you, celebrating all that you will accomplish!   And YOU will be there for all of his as well.  Together, you are going to create a great life built on a foundation of respect, faith, and love for one another!

Over the years, those words,"No man will ever love you or take you seriously because you don't have a degree." have played over and over again in my mind.  Evolving in meaning and in the ways they affect me.  The whole, "No man will love you" part is laughable and holds no bearing anymore....but it's still the whole societal meme that you are less worthy of respect if you don't have a formal education that continues to have some kind of hold on me.  And while the impact of those words seem to fade over the years, there is still ignominy there.  I still cringe when the fact that I don't have a degree comes up in conversation.  I have to go back and remind that 29 year old.....

Don't get me wrong, I am a HUGE proponent for higher education....the chance to open so many knew doors of the mind!  At this stage in my life, if I chose to go back to school, I'm not sure KIND of degree I would use!  I like what I do.  I do often toy with the idea of just taking courses that stimulate me....And before I slip the mortal coils I could put them all together into a liberal arts degree and say, here!  Here is my degree!  But..... for what?  While I don't have a piece of paper on the wall, I consider myself an educated person.  I have always  enjoyed learning and expanding my mind.  I'm a seeker by nature.   Wouldn't I rather indulge in classes, online courses, books, travel...anything that interests and resonates with ME...FOR ME?

So that I can simply be a better human being....

I've know quite a few formally educated people who are complete pricks.  Degrees, yes.  Emotional/interpersonal intelligence.  HELL no.    Enjoy hiding behind that paper on the wall.

3 crappy things about me.

Fun!

1.  When I am overtired, sick, dealing with a stressful event, or overstimulated (or, god forbid, all of the above) I feel very raw, frazzled, impatient, and short.  An exhausting struggle to keep from being a bitch ensues.  Sometimes it gets the best of me.  This brings me feelings of shame, failure and guilt because sometimes it affects the ones I love.

2.  Hi.  My name is Dana and I am addicted to screens.  We don't get TV not just because it's mostly crap and a time suck but because when it's on, it grabs my attention to the point that my ADD mind goes into hyper-focus and the Alpha state.  Same goes for the computer and iPHONE.  I disappear into these things and loose total track of time.  I strive to live a full life and I abhor the affects that I'm seeing on people because of technology-especially our children.  I could go on and on....But first I have to deal with my own addiction to it.  I need to turn off and tune in more often...get on a more strict "screen schedule" and least make better use of my screen time instead of just tangent surfing.  This month of writing on my blog has been great for me....purposeful.   I need to be the change I want to see...and be a better role model.  It truly IS an addiction.

3.   I am TERRIBLE at keeping my life organized, timely and tidy.  My schedule, cleaning the house, getting things done, remembering things.  I HATE this deficit in me.  And that's all I want to say.  What CAN I say?  I try....

The rantings of a massage Therapist

Dear Massage therapy clients…the 5% of you-You know who you are-...It's time to GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER. 

The Stinkys:
Hey!  Lookit YOU, studly,  coming straight from the gym to your massage without showering first!  Thanks so much, fucker.  I REALLY appreciate the road kill smell emanating from your drippy pits.  There’s NOTHING like the smell of ass on a Monday morning and are you enjoying the feeling of grainy sweat salt mixed with oil being rubbed over you skin?!

Yeah, lady..... your 3 days dead salmon-baking-in -the -sun BREATH is making me puke in my mouth.  And you're FACE DOWN on the table with me at your feet right now! What does THAT tell ya?!   Can't wait to work on your neck and head!!!  Reminder to self:  Set a bowl of mints on the cabinet so that some folks might take the hint....

The Creepys:
Whoops!  Pardon me, sir!  Perhaps you didn’t understand the part when I said,”You can undress and slip under the sheet and blanket on the table.  I’ll give you some privacy and be back in a couple of minutes.”  YOU, sir, are still standing in the middle of my massage room in nuthin’ but your Spiderman underpants.  Really?  Spidy?  No, I’m NOT impressed.

 Thank you, but NO please, I’m NOT ok with you laying naked and spread eagled on my table with no sheet covering you, Madame.   I KNOW we're both "girls", but this isn't a fucking locker room.  I'm not comfortable with your dirty bits and floppy tatas staring me in the face. 

And on the other end of the spectrum....are you SERIOUS, my dear?!?!?  You are wearing full on scratchy wool long underwear and won't take them off?  I know it's winter in Alaska, but......alright.  Maybe you have issues....You DO realize this massage is gonna kinda suck now?

Ew.   You are totally silent and staring wide eyed at the ceiling.  Are you dead?  No, I can see that you're kind just looking around at the ceiling.....I don't know what's going on in there but....Jeezus, close your eyes or something, it's creepin' me out.....

The Commanders:

YOU again.  I consider myself a kind and giving person, but I have put up with your malarkey for waaaaaaay to long.  I'll give you this one last time.  If you pull the same shit after I tried to set boundaries last time, I will be referring you out to someone that can "better serve your needs".   Are you going to give me the ole, "Please speak quietly, I have a migranine.  Turn the music up.  Turn the music DOWN.  Don't you have any guitar music?!  I cannot listen to piano, it sets off my nerves.  Can't you cover the window up?!  A good massage therapist does this, a good massage therapist does that.  Turn the heat down.  Turn the heat up.   Go softer.  Softer.   SOFTER!  (you realize I'm not even TOUCHING you right now, right??!?  You fucking loon.)  MORE PRESSURE.  PLEASE! Dig in there.! That's giving me a migraine!  Use less oil please.  Could you use MORE oil?!?!?  Your hands should NEVER leave my body!  Turn that music DOWN!", again today, are you , lady?!?!?!
Massage your "bra line" in the front?  WTF?!  Talk to your husband about that one.  Ugh.  For the love of GOD I'm not interested in listening to an hour of your misandristic bitching.  I'm sorry your husband is such a douche and your son is a mouth breathing turd.  My husband is the best out there so STFU.  What?  You want me to massage you like Karen does?  WHO THE FUCK IS KAREN?!?!?  I don't KNOW Karen and I've never experienced a massage by Karen so how in the name of Beelzebub would I know how she massages?!?!?  Alright, LOOK.  You lay there talking about all the FANTASTIC massage therapists you've had in the past and how 'green' I am....I've been a kick-ass massage therapist for 10 years!!!!!    WHY do you come back to see me THREE fucking times a week?!?!?  Answer me THAT, you horrible TROLL!  That's IT.  I'm done with you.  I cringe and grit my teeth every time you come in the door.  I'd rather punch myself in the va-jay-jay then deal with you ever again.  Let me give you the contact info of a scanky massage therapist who brings dishonor the the profession and deserves a client like you  another massage therapist who can better serve your needs then I can.  Ya corpulent TOADY.

The Fucktards:
Folks, I just LOVE it when I ask you to show me where you are hurting and you answer with, "oh, you'll feel it."   In case you thought otherwise,  I'M NOT A FUCKING WIZZARD.  Yes, I can seek and destroy knots and hypertonic muscle fibers....but most often then not I can't "feel" where your pain is.  A knot hiding under your scapula may be referring pain to your occipital ar-oh, NEVER MIND.  Just SHOW me, will ya?!?!  Just fucking point and help me out?

Girl, are you pulling out a CELL PHONE from under the sheet there?!??!  Really?!  Your TEXING and SURFING during my massage?!?  Just LEAVE.  There is absolutely NO hope for you.

You unabashed dude, you!  You want me to perform "skin rolling".  You are obese.  Can I say, NO?

Honey, really?  You come in for both 15 minute chair massage and 1 hour sessions on the table and you refuse to rest your head in the face cradle for fear of smudging you makeup?  Do you realize how STUPID you look trying to hold your head above the cradle?!?!  Your poor neck!  You come to see me because YOUR NECK HURTS!!!!!  By the way, I SAW you selfishly cut in the Port-a-Potty line at the Zombie Run last year.  My 8year old really had to go.  Vain bitch.

Oh, for fucks sake, come ON.  Look, if you're so content that you fall asleep and totally droll onto the arm rest under your face cradle, fine.  Glad your happy.  But maybe grab a tissue and clean that slime off of it before you leave?!  That kinda shit will make me puke.  Thanks so much for leaving this for me to deal with.

Yeah, THANKS, mister for leaving my tip strewn on the table instead of just handing it to me.  FYI: I'm not a whore.  Thanks for keepin' it classy.

Ok, tough guys!  I'm so impressed with you when you tell me, "Don't worry, you can't hurt me!"  Oh, yes I fucking can!!!! Get over the whole, "no pain no gain" myth, would ya?!?!?  It doesn't have to hurt to heal, Beefcake.

And lastly...the Smokers(also part of the Stinkys but deserving a category of their own):
YOU ALL STINK.  All the time.  Period.  End of story.  You don't think you do, but you DO.  NEVER, NEVER assume we can't smell it just because YOU can't.  No amount of perfume or breath mints will hide it.  It only makes the smell more pukeworthy.  Only smoking outside and driving with the window open to dissipate the smell does not work, LOL!   The toxic smell (and I swear to god, RESIN)oozes from your pores while I'm trying to help heal you.  All I can smell are the fumes emanating from your blackened sick lungs.  Can't go on about it without retching....

To the other 95% of my clients, you ROCK!!!!  You make this profession so exciting, fun, challenging, fulfilling and rich for me!  Know that your friendship, or silence, feedback, courtesy, and willingness to take your health seriously is so greatly appreciated!  You enrich ME as much as I may enrich you! 

Cheers, my friends!

The beginning of saying goodbye....

 

Dylan's Graduation from High School.  It was a surreal experience watching our daughter, and many of her peers that we have watched grow from spunky little kids to emerging adults ready to step out into the world.  It all really hasn't quite sunk in for me yet.

 

So, then on Saturday, my early morning hissy fit about the 8 inches of snow was assuaged when the plows got out and cleared the roads before noon.  There was quite a bit of melt as well.  Most people showed up throughout the afternoon to celebrate Dylan's graduation and wish her well on her new journey.  It took tremendous effort to keep my emotions in check all day and by the end I was emotionally exhausted.  It was like I could feel this tangible pain in my chest every time a loved one hugged Dylan, wished her well, and said goodbye.  These WONDERFUL people who have loved Dylan and been there for her throughout her life...helping to send her off with love and words of encouragement.  I hope she can feel how truly blessed she is with this motley heard of tender friends.  No one is perfect but we have all been here...with an abundance of care and love.

Does this cake not ROCK!?!?!  Camo in purples?!?!  SO perfectly Dylan!  Kory, you are AMAZABALLS!!!!

A beautiful letter that Willa wrote for Dylan....It made us ALL cry!

Dylan reading Willa's sweet letter

Long-time supporters, Maryanne and Kent.  Friggin' rockstars.

TNT and Gramma

Mary gets a 'waterfall' braid.  Always a wholesome time with the Olssons!

The kids can really rip apart a room.....

Let's have a toast!



TOAST!

Tomorrow, Dylan swears into the air force and we see her off at the airport. 

 

Yeah.  I'm struggling.......

Switcheroo...A struggle in white.

Welp.....I had it in my head that today's prompt was "Share something you're struggling with right now".  But apparently that one is for tomorrow.  The correct prompt for today is about telling a childhood story.  Well fuck it.  I'm switching them.  My "struggle" post was going to be about Dylan leaving on TUESDAY for  Basic Fucking Training, leaving the nest for good.  But I'm just not ready to go there yet.  I'll save that for later.

Today I am struggling with the FREAK FUCKING 8 INCHES OF NEW SNOW THAT WE GOT OVERNIGHT.  It is MAY the fucking 18th.  The 3rd Godamned week of the month.  It is still snowing, for the love of god.  Today is the graduation/goodbye party that we are throwing for Dylan and many folks are not going to want to drive the hell up this mountain road to attend it.  Just look at this bullshit:

I love Alaska, kids.  I love snow.  But, folks....this shit just ain't right.  Anyone who tells me that Global Climate Change is a hoax will get a punch to the uvula.  This is scary fucked up and makes me want to take the advice of my client, Captain Crazy, an astrophysicist who tearfully implored me to pack up my family pronto and move to Denver because our increasingly flaring sun would soon cause the demise of most of our civilization.  

So yeah.  I'm struggling with that.  A little bit.  A couple months ago, I was telling my mom, "Yeah!  When you're out in May we'll go hiking!  We've gotten so little snow this year that it will all be melted!  We'll have access to some good trails!"  Then we got a dumping of 3 feet.  Now this shit.  And cold temps to boot so it won't be melting until next week.

It's because I put the snow boots in storage in the basement, I KNOW it.  The Snow Gods were displeased at my presumption.  Now we have to get the boots, shovel and plow, -FUCK YOU CORONAL EJECTIONS....AND SNOW...AND GLOBAL CLIMATE INSTABILITY....AND YOU, TOO SARAH PALIN.

Hmmmm.....I wonder if the man formerly known as Captain Crazy would recommend Fort Collins......

NOT my photo

Update.  Some "interesting" facts:

 

...ANCHORAGE SETS A HOST OF NEW RECORDS...

THE OFFICIAL CLIMATE STATION FOR ANCHORAGE (AT THE NATIONAL WEATHER
SERVICE OFFICE ON SAND LAKE ROAD) RECEIVED 0.3 INCHES OF SNOW ON
FRIDAY MAY 17. THIS SETS A DAILY SNOWFALL RECORD BARELY EDGING OUT
THE OLD RECORD OF 0.2 INCHES SET IN 1989. VERY LIGHT SNOW CONTINUES
TO FALL IN ANCHORAGE...BUT TO THIS POINT IN TIME NO NEW MEASURABLE
SNOW HAS ACCUMULATED AT THE NWS ON SAND LAKE ROAD.

A NEW DAILY RECORD FOR LIQUID PRECIPITATION WAS ALSO SET ON FRIDAY.
RAIN PLUS MELTED SNOW ADDED UP TO 1.30 INCHES WHICH BREAKS THE OLD
DAILY RECORD OF 0.21 INCHES SET IN 1959.

THE 0.3 INCHES OF SNOW RECEIVED ON FRIDAY MAKES 2012-2013 THE
LONGEST SNOW SEASON SINCE RECORDS BEGAN IN 1917. THERE WERE 231
DAYS BETWEEN THE FIRST MEASURABLE SNOWFALL (SEPTEMBER 29) AND THE
LAST MEASURABLE SNOWFALL (MAY 17). THIS BREAKS THE OLD RECORD OF
230 DAYS SET IN 1981-1982.  

THE HIGH TEMPERATURE ONLY REACHED 37 DEGREES ON FRIDAY. THIS SETS A
NEW DAILY RECORD FOR LOWEST MAXIMUM TEMPERATURE ON MAY 17 BREAKING
THE OLD RECORD OF 44 DEGREES SET IN 1971. THIS ALSO MAKES MAY 17
THE LATEST DATE A MAXIMUM TEMPERATURE THAT LOW HAS OCCURRED.
THE PREVIOUS LATEST OCCURRENCE OF A HIGH TEMPERATURE OF 37 DEGREES
WAS MAY 4TH...OBSERVED IN THE YEARS 1945...1949...AND 2013.
 
$$

"A favorite photo of yourself and why"?! Ughh.....

98%  of  photos of ME are to DIE from.  I HATE photos of me.  I see them and that is NOT what I see in the mirror!  Is THAT what people see me as??!  Hellz!  It's like hearing your recorded voice...THAT doesn't sound like me!  On the rare occasion, I'll get a decent shot.  And I don't mind displaying it on the internets!  I really like my Blogger profile picture.  My hair was shorter then,and  I think I really captured the more whimsical, fun, fresh side of myself with that one.  And then there is my FB profile pic.....THAT is what I see when I catch my reflection....
But I don't want to turn this into a vanity thing.  All these chicks on the interwebs....stay at home mommy-types with wealthy older hubbies reveling daily in their self-importance under the guise of  innocent coquette-ishy "look at the cute hipster outfit I found at the second hand shop!"  Get over yourselves!
But I've digressed.....

While this picture is not the most "pretty" one ever taken of me, it's one of the most FULL OF FUCKIN' AWESOME!!!! 

Here I am crossing the finish line of my first full MARATHON.  Somewhere between a grimace of pain and total exhilaration,  physically spent yet feeling SO alive and powerful....full of love for my husband holding my hand there and crossing with me, for my cheering children who I had just passed.....feeling PRIDE.....yelling,"YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH"!!!!!!!!!!!  This photo taken seconds before I burst into tears. 

I can NOT wait for this season's race!!!!!  BRING IT, BITCHES!!!!!!!!!!!

'Tis me lot in life....

Today I'm to share how I work to overcome my lot in life.  Meh.  This question is making me cranky this morning.  There's not much about my worldly fate to bitch about and I'd rather not pitty pot and summon up the negative.  I guess I'm very fortunate then, that I don't have to sit here and sift through a lot of muck to choose something to discuss!  My life is pretty blessed!  There really is only ONE "lot" in my life's portion:  Attention Deficit Disorder, the true fucking bane of my existence.

This brain glitch of mine has affected my life in negative ways since childhood.  Growing up in the 70s-80s, quiet girls with ADD didn't get noticed in school and diagnosed.  The ADHD boys did because they usually had the hyperactive component of this disorder rendering teachers frazzeled and exhausted.  I was just labeled "LAZY", "unmotivated", "careless", "dreamy".  I spent many many years thinking that I just wasn't very bright.  Maybe I was retarded and my parents worked very hard to hide it!?
My ADD fed bullying, bred misunderstanding with my parents and teachers, made finishing college an impossibility, and has negatively impacted  many of my jobs and relationships.  I have left a wake of irritated, inconvenienced, disappointed people behind me. 
With ADD comes an abundance of shame, guilt, embarrassment, isolation.......
It wasn't until I was 36 that I took action.  I had long suspected some type of learning disability or ADD but also held that very irrational fear that I would probably just be told that I'm simply not very bright.  I didn't want to face that.  After having a baby and becoming a stay at home mom, my inability to hold down the house became a point of contention for my husband and I.  I had all day at home, why weren't things getting done?  I was trying very hard to handle this new job of mine.  And to anyone outside my brain, it simply looked like I was an unmotivated, insensitive, scatterbrained, housewife type.  I don't blame Miles for feeling concerned and upset at all....But it just wasn't true.  And I HAD to find out, once and for all, what the HELL was wrong with me.  So, after discussing my lot in life with a therapist, she referred me to a Neuropsychologist for a 3 day barrage of tests to uncover what was up with my faulty brain.  Attention Deficit Inattentive Disorder it was. When he went over the results with me, the first thing he said-with a chuckle-was,  "Well, your fears of being retarded are unfounded.....your intelligence scored very high, in the SUPERIOR range!  ADD is simply the weight tied to your foot making it hard to stay afloat.  The weakest link in your chain, if you will."  I cried.  It was SUCH a relief to let go of that stupid childhood fear.  I felt such pride to know that I was actually damned SMART!  ROT in HELL all you people who fed my feelings of inferiority over the years!!!!

Since my diagnosis I have tried a few different meds for ADD with no real results.  The cruelest experience being a combination of 2 meds that worked wonders for about ONE month.  It was like I woke up a new person!  I could stay on task!  I could remember and recall little details and facts!  I was ON THE BALL!  Mind in overdrive!  For the first time in my life, the veil of ADD was lifted and I truly experienced my "superior intelligence" for the first time!   It was amazing!  But it only lasted a short while....  Slowly as the days went by I could tangibly feel that veil descending again.  Distraction and overstimulation settled back in...my memory and ability to organize worsened....  And then, heartbreakingly, I was back to "normal".  It was very "Flowers for Algernon".  We tweaked the dosage for awhile, tried new meds.  Nothing really worked.  A lot of time, money, and energy wasted.  NOT worth putting CRAP into my body for, that's for sure.  The ONLY thing that I have felt makes a small dent in my ADD is the OMEGAS.  Glorious natural salmon oil.  So I take an overdose every day and it helps take the edge off, if you will.  My current plan of action nowadays, is to remain armed with knowledge(books, articles, resources filed away), know my limitations and not over-commit, and to readily admit my limitations to people without shame.  I struggle with the idea that people may think I use it as an excuse. I DO NOT.  I NEED to inform people about who I am and how I operate.  ADD is an insidious bugger.  It's unfair.  To people not in the know, it can make you look like a insensitive selfish ass....a total air head....a not very bright person....and I am NONE of these.  I HAVE to let the people around me know that.  Friends, co-workers, bosses..... whoever's lives I may affect.
In the future, I would like to delve back into some cognitive function work like CogMed to see what that brings me.....  But for now, it is what it is.  I work with it the best that I can...  Actually, I bet "they" have created a Godamned iPHONE APP that works with training ADD brains!!!!!  For Free!

............But what I wouldn't give to be able to synthesize and recall information....One of my greatest desires is to be able to really carry on great debates with people-especially political and ethical-without fear of loosing my train of thought, without my mind going blank and not being able to recall facts, without sounding uninformed....like that one month when I had such mental clarity, when I truly lived up to that superior intellect.......why is it SNOWING in mid May?  I need to get Willa up or we'll be runninL8.....  I need to pick up grad fixin's for Dylan's party.  This computer gets REALLY hot on my legs.....What is that bird call I'm hearing?  My Buddha fountain sounds so peaceful.  I shouldn't have had that piece of cake last night.  Tonight is Willa's play!  Shit I need to wake Wil- ooooo!  A snowshoe hare!!!  Pretty!

One day...

So today's prompt, of course, lands on a very atypical day.  I'm on "vacation", I'll be keeping Willa out of school today, and my mom is visiting.  We plan to take off soon on a little road trip to see some wild life.  I'll be posting photos and captions of our day, but I will also give an overview of a more typical Wednesday.


Liquid motivation....always in my favorite mug.



Willa starts her day with a lovely snuggle with me on the couch

Watching out our living room window to see what today's schizo weather will bring.  Currently it's vacillating between a socked in valley with freak snowfall and brightening skies with a bit of blue sky peeking through.   Hoping to take my mom to the Wildlife Conservation Center.

And we made it there.  Cute porky!!!!

Finally entered the modern age and got an iphone.  Been teaching myself how to operate the damn thing.

What to wear....what to wear?

Sisters watching a movie

 

A cab toast with my mom

Heading into town...loving the panorama setting!!!!

*Something is now SNAFU with Blogger's photo shit....my pics are out of order and I can't add captions...  So basically you are seeing our day at the Wildlife center, getting ready to go out to  grad dinner#1 for Dyl and stuffin' our bellies full.  A GREAT DAY!

An IDEAL Wednesday:

My Alarm goes off at 6:am.  I heave myself out of bed and cross the room to slap the bloody thing off.  Enough action to keep me awake and not heading back to the comfort of my warm bed.  First things first:  Pee, wash face, drink a pint or 2 of water, take my happy pill, turn on the computer, pour coffee, and plant myself on the couch for news gathering, FBing, writing and checking email.  I need this hour to slowly come out of my grogginess.  I usually wake up happy...just kinda out of it until I get a cup of hot java in my system.

Around 7-7:30 I go and rattle Willa's cage, fix our lunches and breakies, all the while herding a very distracted 9 year old out the door for school.  We are often runninl8.

On the ride in  I try to get the news from NPR, constantly turning down the sound because of the more disturbing news-Willa doesn't need to hear it.....I might as well just keep it off, then!!!!  I blow a kiss to Willa as she runs into school-she still blows one back :) -and head across town to the Middle Way Café-my office for an hour before I have to go to work.  On the way, I manage to curl my eyelashes and brush a little mascara on with out killing myself or anyone else(I wait for a light)so that I can jump right out of my car, get my 12 oz drip and settle in under great art to engage in creative stuff on my laptop.

9:45 hits and I head to work, hoping that I will have a full client load.  Otherwise, I'm sitting around reading my Nook or chatting with clients in the therapy room.  And not getting paid.

After work I down lunch on the way to the gym.  Hit the iron for an hour and intervals on the Stepmill.  Or I just opt for a good run or skate ski somewhere.  Shower nice-n-fresh and relaxed, throw some protein down my maw, and try to get in an errand or 2 before picking up Willa from school.  Seeing her makes me so happy.  Some days she is full of stories and ideas on the car ride home, some days she is quiet and contemplative.  Once home, I get her a snack and she either absorbs herself in play, and I check in on the internets or she and I do something together.  A walk, a game, and art project or just goofing around on the couch.  I try to catch up on laundry and chores...and tell myself how lame I am at that and how I HAVE GOT TO get Willa with the program of doing her own chores and am I so lame or what?  I like to put on some lively jazz while I cook dinner, sometimes we dance.  A perfect evening is when we are all home and sitting around the dinner table.  Me, Miles, Willa and Dylan....interrupting each other as we all try to spit out our day's events!

If I'm REALLY lucky and Dylan is home, SHE cleans up the dinner dishes!  Willa gets ready for bed, we read to her(currently it's Harry Potter #4), and once she's reading in her own bed, and Dylan has gone off to her room, Miles and I finally relax on the couch to snuggle and talk for awhile.  Sometimes we attempt to watch a movie.

Then it's off to bed to read a couple paragraphs before nodding off.  And/or stuff.